“Firstly, I have had concerned people who are under the impression that I am still in hospital on the psychiatric ward. I would like to make it clear that I was released from the hospital on Monday 12thFebruary and I am now an out-patient receiving regular home help, advice and monthly medication all supplied by the caring, Hong Kong Health Service.
These blog posts are all from a journal I kept whilst I was a patient on the psychiatric ward in the hospital, giving readers an insight into the world of a bipolar sufferer.
My bipolar blog entries are fifty percent cathartic and the other fifty percent (I hope) is a raw, open, honest and heartfelt aid to help people in understanding or coping with bipolar and mental illness.”
WEDNESDAY 23rd JANUARY
MOOD: minus 4
I was woken this morning at 6am to have my blood pressure taken then I fell back to sleep until the brilliant white glare of fluorescent lights lit up my eyelids and over the tannoy system breakfast time in the dining room was announced loudly in Cantonese
I’m feeling extremely drowsy this morning from the medication reminding me of many heavy nights on the “cheeba cheeba y’all” (Schoolly D). I’m also suffering from bad light-headedness and balance issues with earth so I must do things at sloth speed or end up horizontal with the ground. Forgetfulness together with a short attention span are other factors that are causing me problems right now.
Showered at 9am when my name was called. Clean and fresh!
I talked to a member of staff about my situation and mood.
10am–11.20am. I played Chor Dai Di (cards) with 3 other patients though most of the time I felt I was drifting in and out of different dimensions resulting in me not winning a single game. A great way to pass time.
11.30am. Lunchtime. Mashed spuds, pork in a sauce and cabbage. An orange, that’s incredibly difficult to peel, for afters.
12am. I spoke to the most wonderful woman in the known universe, my darling Cassie managing to spend a short time listening to her voice. I love you babe. X
I didn’t have a particularly good sleep last night so I went to bed at 2pm until 3.45pm to catch some extra Z’s.
4.30pm–5pm. I’m writing my diary sat with a patient called Johnny who is drawing on paper I’ve ripped from this journal, and I am happy to see his mute contentment drawing and writing…or is he scribbling?
He suffers from psychosis believing he is a talented singer on a Chinese version of the X-Factor. When I first met him his exaggerated hand and arm movements gave me the impression he was a Kung Fu master, until I was corrected by a doctor informing me it’s him singing into a microphone. Silly me!
5.50pm. I spoke to Greg on the phone about telling my friend Justin I’m in hospital.
6.10pm. I’m sat in a trance-like state induced by the medication watching RTHK (which is the local Hong Kong based TV Channel) broadcasting in Chinese without subtitles.
6.45pm. Cathal arrives with a large cup of hot tea from Costa coffee and a fresh orange juice too that I drank while we chatted and laughed about shit, intermittently interrupted by short bursts from the wards Kung Fu master, Johnny. Rowan was meant to be coming up to visit me but, he got lost in a taxi and sadly wouldn’t be able to make it to the hospital before visiting time finished.
7.30pm. Time for biscuits and warm milk.
9pm. My medication was increased. Knockout time!